I like the flowers, I like the butterflies...

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
jstor
jstor

You're on Tumblr right now, so it's not a big leap to assume that some of you might be, um, avoiding doing something else. Here's a legit thing to do right now—read about strategies to confront procrastination and writing blocks! Open access, so you don't have an excuse!

what a personal attack lol
okitagumi
spacelazarwolf

ppl who oppose gender affirming care for kids are nuts like the extent of medical intervention for trans kids is maybe puberty blockers but they’ll still be like “SO UR SAYING WE SHOULD LET TODDLERS HAVE TOP SURGERY???????” barbara toddlers do not have a top to surgery

watches-and-windchimes

Saw someone asking "so do you endorse giving puberty blockers to five year olds?"

Friend, a five year old should not have puberty to block. If they do that's called precocious puberty and is the original reason puberty blockers were invented. If a five year old is going through puberty I absolutely endorse them being given puberty blockers

vaspider
biblioprincessdalian

Applying for jobs is a hell designed specifically to torment autistic people. Here is a well-paying task which you know in your heart and soul if they just gave you a desk and left you alone and allowed you to do it you would sit there and be more focused and enthusiastic and excellent at it than anyone else in the building. However, before they allow you to perform the task, you must pass through 3-4 opaque social crucibles where you must wear uncomfortable clothes and make eye contact while everyone expects you to lie, but not too much (no one is ever clear exactly how much lying is expected, “over” honesty is however penalized). You are being judged almost entirely on how well you understand these very specific and unclear rules that no one has explained. None of this has anything to do with your ability to perform the desired task.

softgaycontent

It is hell! I want to acknowledge that the original point of the post is NOT fixed by my providing solutions (the way jobs are filled makes no sense), but also I want to leave some notes for folks struggling with these unspoken rules. 

Some brief notes on the correct kinds of “LYING”:

Always use “I” expressions, instead of “we”:
  1. eg “I created a solution to a recurring problem by doing [x].”, even if it was really you and two others in a group
  2. If you LED the group (or did project-management), you can say, “I led a team to create a solution to a recurring problem by doing [x].”
  3. This is because employers like to know that YOU can do, and they also value team-leadership. If you say “we”, they may stop you and ask what You did specifically. You can avoid this by just saying “I”.
Someone asks if you have experience in a program (like excel):
  1. If you feel confident using it:  “Yes, I am very proficient.”
  2. If you have used it a few times, and could at least google what to do next: “Yes, I have good experience.”
  3. If you don’t have any experience: “I have used it before. I generally pick up programs very fast, and I’m a quick learner.”
Mistakes (some interviewers may ask about a time you made a mistake, or a weakness of yours):
  1. Good answers are those with solutions.
  2. Bad answer examples:  “Sometimes I don’t catch mistakes before sending things.”  OR  “I don’t like working with other people”
  3. Good answer examples:  “I had a problem catching typos, so I implemented steps that force me to check my work.”  OR  “I prefer to do things on my own so I know it’s done right, but I’m working on trusting my teammates to take on pieces as well.”
Someone asks if you’ve ever led a team / managed a project:
  1. Try to say YES to this question (even if it is a lie)
  2. If you have, say yes, and say how many people were on the team. 
  3. If you haven’t, but you played a large role in a group of people, say yes, and talk about your primary role on the team. 
  4. If you haven’t, but you worked solo on something that needed input from other people, say yes, and say what the project was about. 

Additional:

Misc Rules
  1. You can ask people to repeat interview questions
  2. You can write down interview questions while they’re asking (write the basics of the question down for yourself, like the top things you have to answer). People will wait for you to finish writing, you don’t have to answer Immediately.
  3. Try to keep your answer to questions somewhere between 30 seconds to 1 minute and 30 seconds. You don’t have to time it, but if you find that your answers are taking 3 minutes, you might lose interest.
Have a list of projects / bragging points to talk about in advance
  1. Try to make sure they at least answer the core question asked, don’t just bring up a completely unrelated topic
  2. Example: if you are really excited to talk about a program you wrote, and someone asks about balancing projects, you can say you are good at AUTOMATION, and an example is this program you wrote
“Do you have any questions for us?” (A question asked at the end of most interviews.)
  1. “What has been your favorite part of working at [company]?”
  2. “What’s been your favorite project to work on?”
  3. People like talking about themselves
Thank you emails
  1. Some employers care if you send them a thank you “letter” (email). Sometime by the end of the day (you can do it right after the interview if you think you’ll forget), send a thank you email like this (you can look up other templates, or ask a friend for help):
  2. Subject Line:  Thank You
  3. “Hi [interviewer name],
    It was great speaking with you. Hearing more about the role, as well as what you said about [their answer to a question you asked them] has made me even more excited for this opportunity.
    Thank you for your time today,
    [Your Name]

Good luck!!

halo-magicmoon

Im gonna need this in 2 years!

turbozarky

Honestly the “applying and interviewing for a job” is harder and more stressful than actually doing the job 999% of the time for me. I hate it so much.

softness-and-shattering

Wait they ask about mistakes and weaknesses because they want to hear about solutions?! That makes so much more sense! Why dont they just verbalize the solution part!

theconcealedweapon

The combination of being autistic and being entry level makes it extra hell.

vaspider

A couple more notes:

When you send your follow-up email, it’s okay to ask about next steps or when you might hear from them. To build on the previous script, after the sentence where you say you’re excited, you could insert, “I’m curious about next steps in this process - what can you tell me about your timeline?”

You can use non-work projects to talk about organizing and leading things, especially if you’re new to the job market and they know that. If you were the president or the treasurer of a youth group or ran the fundraiser auction for your school band, you can use that, as long as you can explain concretely what you DID.

I know people who used the fact that they had been head staff for huge digital LARPs on their resumes. They had to lead staff of 20+ people for a digital entertainment endeavor, create procedures and document them, etc.

And that worked.

Don’t lie about what you did, but think about what those activities would “count as” if you were getting paid for it. My wife had like 30+ people reporting to her and 200+ recurring clients with conflicting needs which she had to balance. That’s totally legitimate, you just have to show them that this is what you did.

So yeah, running that Discord RP server for years and years could probably go on your resume if you write it up right.

karometeenk
coughloop

an ant was pushed to its limit last night while carrying a leaf weighing exactly 50 times its body weight. As it walked towards its hill a single snowflake drifted down from heaven and landed right on the stem of the heavy leaf, weighing the ant down far far far beyond its limits. but the ant, a sturdy and brave creature used its sense of resolve and the will of its ancestors to carry itself home under the tremendous weight and will be hailed as a hero by the colony for generations to come.

marzipanandminutiae
elbiotipo

Me: Did you know that medieval cathedrals weren't actually supposed to be dark and rundown places with only stained glass as color? They were bright places full of light... the reason they look like that now is because of the centuries of accumulated grime and dust, here look at this restoration of the Cathedral of Chartres in France:

image

It's based on actual paint from the times, and when you think about it, it makes a lot more sense, after all a church is supposed to be a bright place of hope. Yet when we think about the middle ages we think about grimy and dark cathedrals. I wonder how much of our conception of history is shaped by our current visions of historical buildings.

My Goth GF: listen, I don't think this thing between us is working,

marzipanandminutiae

OP you need to date more goth history nerds

vaspider
vaspider

Listen, I know it's very much a thing that utopian leftists think that religions will simply stop existing once all of our material needs are met, but that is just not the case.

Human beings need ritual. If we are deprived of ritual, we make new ritual. It does not matter if you call it religion or state or whatever it is you call it, human beings will keep making up new rituals.

You cannot stop us, and saying 'this ritual which I like and doesn't hurt anyone else is fine, but that ritual which you like and doesn't hurt anyone else is bad' is just bigotry.

When I say 'you cannot stop us,' I literally mean you cannot stop human beings from making up rituals and religions. Leave a group of six year old girls alone near a mud pit for an hour and you will come back to a newly-minted faith. We make ritual. We make culture. That is what we do.

No, Judaism will not 'naturally cease to exist' when all of our material needs are met. What will happen then is that the Jews will get Jewier, because we will have all the time in the world to study Torah and write stories and make Jewish art. If you met all of my material needs tomorrow, two days from now there would be six more hamsas, a complete bound copy of all the volumes of the Talmud, and a shit-ton of giant Jewish art prints in my house.

You cannot stop people from making up culture and religion. It is, arguably, the thing which makes us human, one of the defining features of our collective humanity. We will always make up silly songs and new religions, and the idea that we'll just give all of that up for some vanilla yogurt and taupe jumpsuits utopian existence is absurd and beyond belief.

queerdo-mcjewface

If all my material needs were met I would go to shul everyday.

captaindemetrios

Jews getting Jewier when our material needs are met is the whole premise of “If I were a rich man”

vaspider

tevye dancingALT
vaspider

Also, I need to note that when I read the first part of this post to @apocalycious, she interjected, "If all of our material needs were met, you'd be in rabbinical school!"

thesaltofcarthage

@vaspider​  I ask this in the spirit of wanting to be educated: if religions were eliminated, what kind of rituals would be created? What would they center around? Your premise is that “humans make rituals” — why? Again, I’m not being sarcastic; I genuinely want to know this. I don’t feel an urge to make a ritual out of anything, so I am wondering what you have learned about human society to base your statement on. 

athingofvikings

Here, have a spontaneous ritual, complete with food offferings, created without any religious intent that emerged in the last 15 years.

shaaknaa

I think there's more to religion than just ritual. That's part of the reason it's so hard to leave. It does a lot of things, fulfills a lot of needs, so even if you aren't into ritual or aren't a 'true believer' there are reasons to want to participate.

For example: Fan is short for fanatic. Someone looked at people that were super into stuff and were like "they're acting kinda religious about it."

Now, Fandoms aren't religions, but when you look at religion and Fandom as wholes there are enough parallels that I think it's safe to say religion has a Fandom component, or perhaps they both harness the same drive. From debating the interpretions of cannon, to creating art and stories, to fostering a community. There's parallels down to antis and hatedom.

Honestly, as an atheist, thinking this way has done a lot to chill me out with religious people. I'm just not in their Fandom. Don't judge an entire Fandom by the toxic few. Oh look, a shipping war.

But let's say somehow having all our material needs met would eliminate the need for religion. People would still want to get into religion, if only because the stories are baller.

dancinbutterfly

Maslow stole his heirarchy from the Blackfoot Nation and turned it individualistic.

The top of Maslow's hierarchy is self actualization.

the top of the the Blackfoot hierarchy is Community actualization and Community perpetuization.

Religion and ritual, in case you're curious, isn't just about self actualization - though it can and does help with that. And a healthy religion will support the other things in the Maslow Pyramid if you are in need.

But a HEALTHY (and i cannot stress that bit enough) religion is very much focused on community actualization - who are we as a group? What are we doing? Why are we doing it? How do we doing it? How do we do it together in away that works? Why is this important and how to we maintain meaning now that we have figured out what is important about people for us as a community? How do we sustain that and hold together as a group?

And since this is a PROFOUNDLY JEWISH POST and I am Jewish, it goes the next step: Community continuity and perpetuitation? How do we keep it going after we are dead without it becoming an empty message cult? How do we hold onto the meaning when the people who have made this group originally are dead? How do the people who come after it keep holding onto that when times change and the world changes? If the world as you know it ends, and everything you know goes down in fucking flames, if your friends and family die and all you can do is find other survivors from your group and start over from scratch? How do you stay you, as an individual and a community?

Jews are EXPERTS at community perpetuation. Our entire culture is built on community perpetuation because we have an apocalypse once every few hundred years tbh.

Fandom is getting good at through the OTW and it's preservationist attitudes. I've seen it. But the time frame is a blink. 50 years compared to 3000 or if you look at other cultures 5000 or 20,000+ (shout out to aboriginal Australians with uninterrupted narrative histories going back to the fucking ice age)

But whether you want to call it a religion or a culture or what? The Blackfoot Nation are right. It's the top 3 that makes what you build REALLY important and it has fuck all to do with anything that may or may not be ephemeral and everything to do with self and community.

Who are you? How do you want to know yourself?Who are your people? How do your people unite? What do they find meaning in, micro and macro? How do they preserve these understandings, practices, and create room for growth? How will they pass it on when they are gone?

Thats why religion(or whatever you call these spontaneous explosions of people forming cultural practices) is not going anywhere. Because people need to know themselves, know each other, know history, and reach into the future.

And all the rest and food in the world isn't going to change that. And honestly why would you want it to?

Like Carl Sagan said, we are a way for the cosmos to know itself. This is just one more way for the cosmos to know itself.

elfwreck

Timothy Leary tackled the purpose of religion in The Politics of Ecstasy. He pointed out that each of these spiritual questions has an analog in the scientific community - that there are two ways to approach them: looking for objective, externally-verifiable answers, and looking for internal, subjective answers.

Subjective answers are not "wrong." The answer to "do I want to marry this person?" is not wrong because it can't be proven or disproven via the scientific method.

Text from The Politics of Ecstasy: The religious experience is the ecstatic, incontrovertibly certain, subjective discovery of answers to seven basic spiritual questions There can be, of course, absolutely subjective certainty with regard to secular questions: Is this the girl I love? Is Fidel Castro a wicked man? Are the Yankees the best baseball team? But issues which do not involve the seven basic questions belong to secular games, and such convictions and faiths, however deeply held, can be distinguished from the religious. Liturgical practices, rituals, dogmas, theological speculations, can be and too often are secular, i.e., completely divorced from the spiritual experience. What are these 7 basic spiritual questions?      The Ultimate Power Question     What is the basic energy underlying the universe—the ultimate power that moves the galaxies and nucleus of the atom? Where and how did it all begin? What is the cosmic plan? Cosmology.     The Life Question     What is life? Where and how did it begin? How is it evolving? Where is it going? Genesis, biology, evolution, genetics.     The Human Being Question     Who is man? Whence did he come? What is his structure and function?     The Awareness Question     How does man sense, experience, know? Epistemology, neurology.     The Ego Question     Who am I? What is my spiritual, psychological, social place in the plan? What should I do about it? Social psychology.     The Emotional Question     What should I feel about it? Psychiatry. Personality psychology.     The Ultimate Escape Question     How do I get out of it? Anesthesiology (amateur or professional). Eschatology.ALT

These questions do not go away if we have all our material needs met. Building communities of people who share the same answers does not go away if we somehow manage to end bigotry and oppression.

Instead, religions get stronger: More supportive, more beautiful, more able to address fine nuances of these larger questions, if there are more people who can spend their time and energy figuring out who we are and how we relate to each other.

embervoices

Here, have a concrete example:

I am a person whose material needs are generally pretty well met.

I am full time unpaid clergy and a spirit worker.

hadeantaiga

Everyone has said it so well here.

There's just so much more to "religion" than "believe in this/these dieties and follow their rules". It's culture, community, connection, ritual, and all the joy and happiness those things bring.

Having your needs meet means you have community, because community is a human need.

And my cantor noticed that too, when I went to speak to her yesterday. She said so many of the things I spoke about showed I was seeking connection and community. It's a human need.

Humans like rituals because we like the things a ritual provides, which is why we keep creating new ones and doing the old ones. Rituals mark the passage of time, the accumulation of experience, they provide a way to come together with other people, they encourage mindfulness, they are a way to celebrate people or events, they give comfort. Plus, humans like repetition!

IDK, the idea that humans will ever cease to have religion is wild to me.